#logged in 2 grab an old post but ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

[imnameimswrld]

ⵌ ׄ ۪ 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐁𝐎𝐘 𝐈𝐒 𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐄 ¹⁶ ׄ ⑅ CL16 ‌˖ ֺ ᰮ

— DESCRIPTION ੭ alex's twin sister has had the hots for a certain blue eyed ferarri driver, and it's finally time to stake her claim on him.

— PAIRING ੭ charles x albon!reader.

— FILE ੭ social media au.

— WARNINGS ੭ language.

— FACE CLAIM ੭ tontawan tantivejakul.

━━━━━━━━━━❪ 🖤 ❫━━━━━━━━━━

alex_albon & yn_albon • 1 hr.

seen by charles_leclerc, landonorris, and 988 335 others

lilymhe replied to alex_albon story !

stop being mean to ur sister alexander.

landonorris replied to alex_albon story !

oh, so that's how it is ? golfing without me now ? okay. cool.

pierregasly relied to your story !

wooaahh, what's with the heart there girl ? trying to steal my man or something ?

get in line gasly, this boy is mine.

user replied to your story !

THE HEART MISS MA'AM !!?!?!?

THE BETTER TWIN

so golfing was fun guys !

we should totes do it again sometimes 😄

STUPID STINKY COPY & PASTE

why ?

so you can just stand there like a flag pole and flirt with charles the whole time ?

THE BETTER TWIN

exactly ! 😁

LILY MOMMY

AND SHE LOOKED DAMN HOT DOIN' IT TOO.

STUPID STINKY COPY & PASTE

i-

it's always 2 against 1 here.

LILY MOMMY

you'll get used to it hun 💋

THE BETTER TWIN

eewwww no being lovey dovey in the gc allowed.

brb guys, gonna go text my man's

STUPID STINKY COPY & PASTE

HE IS NOT UR-

oh forget it, ur hopeless.

FUTURE BF

hey y/n !

it's charles here, lily sent me ur number I hope that's cool with you ?

HIS FUTURE GF

hey charles !

yes ofc omg 😊

FUTURE BF

I think I grabbed ur golf set by accident haha 😅

HIS FUTURE GF

oh no problem !

you can give it back tonight at 8pm, at reagan's diner, and wearing ur finest suit because it is a 3 star restaurant.

FUTURE BF

I...

...uhm....

...huh ?

are u... asking me out ?

HIS FUTURE GF

did I stuttter, charles ?

no ?

so 8pm, sharp. those are my favourite golf clubs that i never use, so i'd like them back.

are we clear ?

FUTURE BF.

yes ma'am.

charles_leclerc & ynusername added to their story ! • 2hr

seen by pierregasly, alex_albon, and 1 224 353 others

alex_albon replied to charles_leclerc story !

WHAT

CHARLES

ARE. U. INSANE.

SHE'S CRAZY !?

but she's miiiinnnneeee 😁

maxverstappen1 replied to charles_leclerc story !

so, what did you do ? huh ?

because how does a total dope like urself, bag a 20 like yn ?

ahh, come on max :\

lilymhe replied to your story !

YAAASSSS QUUEEENNN

GET UR MANS

YOU KNOW IT 😝

user replied to your story !

my wife... had been stolen from me....

user replied to your story !

NO COME BACK TO ME YN 😭

charles_leclerc replied to your story !

how am I going to get people to believe that u wanted me first ?

u won't 🤭

yn_albon

liked by lilymhe, carlossainz55, and 1 332 454 others

yn_albon suck on ur zero points alexander.

View all comments

logansargeant OUCH.

▹ yn_albon not u logs u know i love ya !

[ liked by logansargeant ]

lilymhe as the girlfriend I shouldn't click a like on this post but...

▹ alex_albon but ? BUT !?

▹ yn_albon love ya too lils baby 🎀

maxverstappen1 the real mic drop is alex thinking that YN ALBON couldn't pull a kid like charles.

▹ charles_leclerc I want to take offense but I can't, because ur very much right.

▹ user HOL' ON- alex thought YN MOTHER ALBON couldn't pull any man of her choosing !? 😭

▹ yn_albon aw, thanks maxie !

alex_albon just say u all hate me and call it a day.

▹ yn_albon quit being dramatic lex and answer mum's ft before she beats ur ass with the wooden spoon again.

user so no one's gonna talk abt slide 3 ? NO ONE !? HELLO !? 😭

♡. ♡. ♡.

imnameimswrld OOHOOO BACK AGAIN ??? hiii lovelies, I hope you're all doing well ! college is trying so hard to kick my ass but i am hanging in there (just barely lol)... but I hope you enjoyed this one, I'm switching up the look of my stuff coz I hate the old look :)

[as-is-above-so-below]

Cardigan - John Price x F!Teacher!Reader

Part 2: Midnight Rain

summary: you get yourself in a pickle a/n: hi! I return again! I'm sorry it's short, but I'm trying a new method of posting. Instead of aiming for a specific word count (which leads to me getting writer's block and not posting ANYTHING), I write until I'm satisfied with what I'm trying to achieve. Hopefully, I've achieved that goal, and y'all like it :) Blessed be! << Previous | Next >>

You drummed your fingers against the notebook in your lap and gnawed on the top of your pen. It was late, even by your standards; the sun had long since set, and dinner eaten hours ago. But you were up, sitting in the dark in your living room, heavy rain pelting your old windows. You were trying to pull together a new lesson plan for the following day. A few curious students had started asking questions about the modern military. Like, key differences between military strategies used in the time they were studying and today. And, of course, yet again, you made promises that you were struggling to keep. And you always keep your promises to your students.

Fuck.

The internet wasn’t helping at all. You didn’t study military strategy in any of your courses. Was that even a thing?

The last thing you wanted to do was call him. You were so confident that you could solve your problem yourself, at nine o’clock. Now, it was past midnight, and you were absolutely desperate.

Fuck.

Before your tired brain can flood with guilt and change its mind, you grab your phone from your nightstand and tap into your recent calls log. Your stomach churned, anxiety bubbling up with every trill. God, it’s so fucking late to be calling. It felt like you were split in two. One half of you was praying that his phone was on silent (you know it’s not) or he’ll sleep through the ringing (he won’t), while the other–the miserable, exhausted half–needed him to pick up.

The latter won out.

“Y/N? Are you alright?”

John’s deep, sleepy voice made you feel guilty and incredibly happy that you’d woken him up. Soft and grumbly, rolling in his chest; it made you feel soft and warm inside…

Not the point of the call.

“Hi, John. I’m completely fine, I just…” You took a deep breath, the heel of your free hand pressed into one of your dry, worn-out eyes. “I know you’re this big important captain, and you have work in the morning, but I’m in a bit of a pickle and need a massive favor.”

There was a slight rustling on the other end like he had turned slightly to check the nearby time. “It’s one o’clock in the morning, love,” he mumbled.

You felt even worse. “I know, I’m sorry. Please don’t hate me,” you begged, running a hand over the top of your head. “One of my kids asked about the military. It sparked a whole discussion in class, and I may have overstated my knowledge. I barely know anything about it, and my brain is turning to mush. I’m so tired I wanna cry, and-”

He quickly cut off your rambling. “Woah, hey. Slow down there. What’s going on?” he asked, suddenly sounding much more awake. 

That brought you pause. You honestly hadn’t thought what you would ask if John actually answered the phone through. It was one o’clock in the morning, which John had correctly pointed out, and your brain wasn’t operating at full capacity. 

“I was…wondering if you could give me a lesson. Because I’m super tired, and I like to hear you talk.”

“…You do?”

“Yeah. I’ve learned a lot from you just…talking to me? But I’m a history teacher. I’m an expert on wars, not war.”

There was some shuffling on the phone. On the other line, John was leaning over the edge of his bed, searching blindly for his little pocket planner in the pile of clothes on the floor. The rustling stopped when he placed the device on his pillow, rifling through the calendar. He sniffed and was quiet for a moment, while you nibbled anxiously at your pen. Again.

The silence finally broke with a tired sniffle from John. “I can do you better. Why don’t I come to your classes tomorrow?” he asked.

You froze, pen still between your teeth. John? Coming to your school? Spending the day with your students? That would be the equivalent of introducing your boyfriend to your children. 

“…Really?”

“Sure.”

Could you even call him your boyfriend? You’d been on a few dates, sure, over the last…two months? No, it was closer to three. Had it been that long already? You did some quick math in your head. You’d gone on about one date a week, with a few canceled due to last-minute commitments. Still, about one date a week, over three months…

Holy shit.

“John, I’m sure you’re busy. I couldn’t-”

“Not at all,” he hummed, cutting you off. “Besides, it would take me ‘til class tomorrow to give you a good enough rundown, and the boss loves shite like this.”

“I thought you were the boss?”

You could practically hear a small smile tugging at John’s lips. The expression was a familiar one. The corner of his mouth quirked up, shifting his beard and creating happy wrinkles near his eyes. His nose would scrunch up a bit, too, especially if you were out in cold weather. 

“Everybody has a boss, sweetness. Myself included.”

Christ. Not the pet names. And especially not in the tired, gravelly tone his voice was currently in. John Price was going to be the death of you, even in his unfocused state.

You unfolded your legs from underneath you and moved your notebook onto the coffee table. Your resolve was fading, and you couldn’t be bothered to argue. While you did feel bad about dragging John to your school to fix the problem you created, you weren’t sure you had any other option. Accept defeat? To a group of teenagers? Absolutely not. You’d never live it down. You sighed, rubbing tiredly at your eyes. “If you’re sure…”

“I am.”

A soft smile crossed your face. “Is this just a ploy to meet my kids?”

“Maybe.”

Your sleepy giggles were like music to John’s ears. The sound alone was worth the favor. As if he wouldn’t have done it anyway, just to ease your stress. He would take any and every opportunity to make your day easier or make you happy. What he wouldn’t give to hear that laugh in person, laying beside you in your bed–

No. John’s a good man. A gentleman, he would say. A man who was perfectly capable of not acting on his urges and thoughts. At least, not in person. However, in the privacy of his own home? That was a different story.

“Thank you so much, John.”

Right. You’re still on the phone. He heard a soft click on your end of the call.

“That’d better be you closing your laptop, I’m hearing.”

“It is.”

“Good girl.” You blushed furiously. Fuck. “Get some sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Goodnight.”

taglist: @novausstuff, @cutiecusp, @ittosbigfatmantitties, @helpimhyperfixating, @hihhasotherfixations, @dugiioh, @glitterypirateduck, @cringeycookies, @lethalchiralium

Copyright © 2023 as-is-above-so-below. All rights reserved.

[countdowntotwinpeaks]

WONDERFULXSTRANGE - the prompts!

Here's the list of all 81 prompts submitted so far for this new, sleek, fest edition of wonderfulxstrange! Grab anything you like, make fic or art about it, and post it on February 24th, Twin Peaks day!

Prompting is open until the end of the event, so if you want to join the fun, head over HERE and add your own!

FULL RULES

Without further ado:

Laura working part time somewhere other than the diner—What would it look like for her to work at the hospital?? Or in the school?? Or at the station??

Laura, Donna, Bobby, James, Audrey, and Maddie on winter break, vacationing together as a friend group

Uncle Dick Tremayne hanging out with little man Wally Brando

Hutchenses family dinner (featuring Mr. C)

Mitchums family movie night (featuring the girls)

The phenomenology and temporality of key characters: how they are changed, how they are the same: 1992 and 2017 are linked. Is the cycle broken, or has it changed form? Can any of us break the cycle from within, or must it come from the outside? How do we know if we are inside or outside? What does change look like to someone who feels unchangeable?

olipeaksforever - Jeffrey Beaumont (Blue Velvet) & Laura Palmer having a surreal adventure

Klaasje Amandou (Disco Elysium) & Diane Evans girls night out

olipeaksforever - Annie Blackburn & Dale Cooper lodge dodge healing... Cute and sweet yet sad 🥹

olipeaksforever - Denise Bryson/Dale Cooper lodge dodge where dale isn't in Good State post lodge and denise is Worried

olipeaksforever - Smoker In The Balcony (Disco Elysium) & Dale Cooper meeting at Club Y

olipeaksforever - Albert Rosenfield/Dale Cooper growing old together... Fic or art I don't care just make it pretty 🥹

Harry Truman/Hank Jennings/Dale Cooper evil love triangle

Lucy Moran & Diane Evans getting coffee and talking about their favourite odd guys

michaeltillotson - Annie Blackburn during the events of Twin Peaks: The Return

michaeltillotson - Harold Smith working on his writing (art)

michaeltillotson - Josie Packard trapped in the Black Lodge (art)

michaeltillotson - Laura&Annie: Annie visiting Twin Peaks before joining the convent and interacting with Laura

michaeltillotson - Dale Cooper in the 80s, looking into Blue Rose cases related to aliens / abduction, or any of the cases from The Secret History of Twin Peaks (art)

The bizarre, surreal, cosmic horror politics of the lodge entities (and the humans they target)

Laura's intervention with the angels

Chet Desmond and Theresa Banks (not ship)

Laura and Cooper slip into the Twilight Zone and meet Rod Serling... who is narrating their predicament to his mysterious audience (also no ship fic)

Phillip Jeffries and the many downsides (and upsides) of being a teapot

What if Laura's doppleganger escaped too???

tildytwo — Cooper/Albert/Harry or Cooper&Albert&Harry — surviving chemo

tildytwo — Gordon & or / Albert — what happens after Gordon comes back

tildytwo — Gordon & or / Albert — post- season 2, how they got to the dynamic they have in The Return

tildytwo — Albert & Tammy — generation gap

tildytwo — Albert & Cooper — conflict of interest

tildytwo — Gordon/Albert — "Say please."

tildytwo — Albert & Laura — they never met, but he got to know her almost intimately

tildytwo — Albert & Margaret Lanterman — similar philosophies, but very different methodologies

Dale/(or &)Harry - fishing/camping/generally being in the woods

Denise & Audrey - doing badass agent stuff/Denise as a mentor

Log Lady - anything with her and the spooky elements of the town/surrounding forest

Donna/(or &)Laura - fic or art exploring their relationship more

Audrey - I'd be happy with an pretty artwork of her :)

the FBI agents solving another blue rose case (crossover or AU maybe?)

audrey becoming an FBI agent or a PI

laura palmer what would it look like for you to live

role swap! laura palmer and dale cooper

Albert and or Albert/Dale character study/introspective between Alberts departure in s1/return in season 2

Donna POV of laura through the years- jealousy?? closeted crush?? platonic love for her best friend??

Albert/Dale attempt at a normal romantic date and the dramatic twists and turns it takes...

Harry post Dale/Mr c leaving twin peaks

Laura having a nice time visiting Maddy/vice versa

Diane and Albert queening out (talking shit) on a smoke break or night out

Sam Stanley post Chet Desmond disappearance/leaving the FBI

Margaret & Laura at the Double-R Diner (no ship please!)

mycenaae - Donna/Laura, a reunion 25 years later

Donna & Shelly & Laura & Audrey - girls' night out (or girls' high school lunchtime hangout, ymmv! i just want to see them being friends <3)

Gordon Cole & The Blue Rose Team (Dale, Tammy, Albert) - working a case (no ship please!)

The Bookhouse Boys - what does downtime look like at the clubhouse?

mycenaae - Donna/Laura (or Donna & Laura), another picnic

mycenaae - Lucy/Andy as new parents!

mycenaae - Annie & Laura, meeting again (any context)

sheryllee - Sarah Palmer and Carl Rodd drinking black coffee in their ratty robes

sheryllee - Margaret & Hawk (any context)

sheryllee - Laura, Audrey, and Johnny at the Great Northern

sheryllee - Bobby and Laura at Jack Rabbit's palace

sheryllee - Laura and Sarah (and Maddy, if you want) - just regular, maybe a little psychic, family stuff

sheryllee - Donna and Gersten and Harriet - ALSO just normal family stuff

sheryllee - Laura and Norma planning Meals on Wheels

sheryllee - Audrey and Laura's ghost

Coop and his dad are so similar (new-agey, impulsive, etc.) and Dale dislikes/ignores that. Something about how they feel about each other, or parallels between them, how they both feel about his psychic bond with his mom, etc.

Omegaverse! The classic smut, or something that plays with the verse's weird gender and social rules. (+ breeding would be cute too but obviously optional) Any pairing but Harry/Coop & Albert/Coop are classics

Hank/Harry (NSFW?)- They really did like each other. Frustrated, intense, and maybe a little manipulative-- this would work well as pre-canon. (one of them being trans would be a very interesting addition to this one)

Audrey (& Donna?) - Religion in TP-- The Hornes canonically attend the same church as the Haywards. I'd like to see something about how Audrey feels about that, especially with the corruption/hypocrisy + her family. Just her feelings on the matter/her personal ideas of faith would be great, or bringing Donna in with the sister angle.

Denise/Cooper/Albert (NSFW) - Breeding kink: they lovingly make fun of Cooper for wanting to get knocked up. Then they knock him up. I just need that man in the family way ✋

Diane & Cooper (&/Albert?) - Playful and sincere affection! Flirting at work, falling asleep on couches together, fixing each other's makeup etc.

Hawk/Harry (+Cooper?) - Harry has an easy heart to break, and he's very easily led. It'd be a shame if a close friend (or two) were to protect him from the former and take romantic advantage of the latter.

Harry and Frank, masculinity and the idea of being a Good Cop. Turning a (willful?) blind eye to uncomfortable realities, be it repressed sexuality or atrocities being committed in and around town

laughingpineapple - character of your choice slips through the cracks of reality and ends up in the red room/in other worlds/on lonely highways/along a purple ocean. Laura&Coop optional but always welcome.

laughingpineapple - the opening credits wren. &Laura? &Margaret? &anyone. Just put that bird in the narrative.

laughingpineapple - Tammy&/Cynthia on a case! Like Mulder and Scully but worse!

laughingpineapple - Reddit informs me that the name "Diane" actually means the same as "Dale" in old English. Metaphysical hall of mirrors GO

laughingpineapple - Hawk&Albert gossiping or something, I need their snark to bounce off each other

laughingpineapple - Wally meeting someone who by all rights shouldn't be in this world anymore

laughingpineapple - Naido as her own character, a Lodge entity of sorts, a cocoon for those who were hurt too deeply

laughingpineapple - Albert&Phil. In the '80s? Teapot era? Your pick.

[tealfling]

Rolan Week Day: 2 (Jealously)

yes, I'm playing catch up.

Is Rolan jealous of Coren (my Tiefling Sorc) he could be.

“Oh, I’m adopted,” Coren clarified, taking another drink. She was sitting on the log where Cal and Lia had been as the camp bustled with revelry. Rolan stiffened standing a little straighter. He crossed his arms resting his hand with the goblet on his elbow. He didn’t expect that from her. Maybe the wine was getting to her, making her want to over share. 

“When I was only a few years old, my parents–a drow and a half-elf–found me running away from an orphanage.” She chuckled, “My mom gave them such a talking to before they took me home!” Coren turned the goblet in her hand remembering the story the way her parents liked to tell it. “If you think Cal and Lia are a handful I have five younger siblings! It would have been four if Mama had a say, but twins run in both families…so..”

Rolan gripped his drink tightly as Coren spoke, in a way he imagined as bragging. He didn’t realize they had so much in common. How similar their situations had been, but how different their outcomes. His drink felt rancid in his gut. He was an orphan, only to be taken in and orphaned again. But not her. He had to struggle and study and earn his magic. Her’s came naturally to her and appeared effortless. She had a home. She had a family. That appeared to be alive and well.  Both were born with nothing, but the world just seemed to give her everything, and he resented her for it. Rolan did not wear jealousy well and the fact that she evoked that feeling in him infuriated him further.

“So, do you know it? Rolan? Are you listening?” Coren’s face looked at him rather glumly. He had missed something.

“Sorry,” he drawled, shaking himself out of his head,“you were saying?”

“I was hoping someone that studies magic as well as you might know the Sending spell?”

tagging Coren's parents @faerunsbest & @barbwillbrb

This was based off the original post I made where I thought Coren would ask Rolan to send a message to her parents and what it might say. i posted that below the cut.

Rolan threw back the rest of his drink as the blue tiefling walked away, tail dragging behind her. He gripped his tankard in frustration. He didn't know Sending. As he bent to grab the bottle from the ground, Rolan noticed a folded bit of parchment. It would be an invasion of privacy to read it. He knew this. Even as he watched his fingers carefully unfold the note. Even as his eyes gently glanced over the practiced script and read the twenty-five words he couldn't help her voice.

Coren: abducted by Mindflayers. Infected with parasite. Somewhere between Baldur's Gate and Elturel. Heading to the Shadowcursed lands. Miss you. I want to go home.

[enchantedflameandflower]

Vincent Stevens x reader fic Part 2! by @kus-babygirl

mood board by @kus-babygirl

Vincent x reader multi-part romance! This was all entirely written by @kus-babygirl and her idea as well. I’ve done all the editing and added some bits here and there and she’s asked me to post for her. If you leave a comment make sure to tag @kus-babygirl!

tag list: @jynx15 @karlurbanism

(Part 1)

Part 2

The blare of your alarm wakes you early the next morning, reverberating loudly off the walls of your small apartment. You groan a little before switching it off and sit up in bed, instantly remembering what happened the night before with your new boss, Vincent Stevens. 

"Fuck," you groan to yourself. You hope you still have a job when you go in today. 

After grabbing a scolding shower to wake yourself up and getting dressed in a white blouse, black trousers and a blazer, you grab yourself a quick cereal bar to eat in the car. You check the time, 7:30, and pull on your sneakers. The heels last night killed your feet so you ware going for comfort today. You grab your phone and bag and make your way of out the apartment, locking it up. 

As you make your way out, you quickly say hi to Oliver, the doorman at your building. He is a good guy and always looks out for you. You rush to your car, and on the way to your new work building, you stop at a bakery that is about 8 minutes away and grab two coffees and a mixed tray of bagels, which consists of plain, cinnamon and raisin, blueberry, and poppyseed bagels. 

You get back to your car with your goodies, and make your way to your new office. Once there you find a parking space and head inside, stopping by the front desk to tell them you’re the new receptionist for Vincent Stevens. The woman gives a look of surprise and disbelief, probably because of the thought you would actually want to work under him. Secretly you can"t blame her. There’s probably many women that would refuse to work with him.

But you’re ready to look past the affairs because there might actually be a reason why he did it, bad marriage or something else. You can’t look past the murder accusation, though, if you found out that is true, but all the evidence seemed to suggest he was definitely set up.

The woman quickly composes herself before directing you towards his office, while also giving you a pass key for the building and your new login information for the computer. You smile politely, thanking her before making your way up to his office. 

When you arrive at the office, you put your stuff down on the empty desk, before walking over to Vincent’s door and knocking. You get no answer, so you figure he hasn’t arrived yet and you settle at the desk, logging into your computer while making a list of things you want to get for your office, if you are allowed to decorate it. 

Not even 10 minutes later, Vincent walks in with a border collie beside him. He startles when he sees you sitting there, shocked that you still wanted to work for him after last night. "Hey," he says, looking at you nervously. 

You lift your head up and smile slightly when you see him. "Hello, Mr. Stevens," you say, getting up and grabbing a coffee and the bagels, and offering them to him.

He looks at you curiously, obviously wondering why you would get all this stuff. 

"It’s a peace offering,” you explain quickly. “I wanted to apologize for what I said last night. I’m not going to make any excuses, but I was a tiny bit drunk. That still doesn’t excuse what I said, and I shouldn’t have said it to you, knowing you were my new boss. I’m kind of buttering you up to keep my job,” you admit. 

He chuckles softly, shaking his head while taking the coffee and a poppyseed bagel. "Please call me, Vincent. Mr Stevens makes me feel old. And don’t worry, sweetheart, your job is safe. I should be the one apologizing after flirting with you like that. I guess after all of the aff-" 

"I know what you mean," you interrupt, blushing at the nickname, but knowing he probably doesn"t want to talk about the affairs and everything else with you.

You put the tray back on your desk before looking at him, and his dog comes over and starts sniffing at you.

"That’s Finn, my dog. He comes to work with me, because I don’t want to leave him alone at home. I hope you’re okay with dogs," he says, looking at Finn, 

You smile, kneeling down and giving Finn some love. "I love dogs," you happily smile. 

"That’s good, he will take any amount of that," he chuckles, watching you. 

After a few minutes of petting Finn, you stand up, grabbing your coffee and taking a few sips of it. 

"You got your pass key and log-in information alright?" he asks. 

You nod, "Yeah, I did, thank you. What would you like me to do today?" 

"Just basically take my calls and set up meetings for me. Write appointments down, the usual stuff." He smiles, making his way towards his office with Finn in tow and taking a cinnamon and raisin bagel on the way. 

"Okay, that I can do," you smile back from behind your desk. 

After taking calls all day and scheduling meetings, it’s time to finally go home. 

Vincent walks you down to your car, waving goodbye when you leave the car park. You go into your apartment and crash on the sofa, feeling absolutely exhausted from the day. You can’t help but smile realising you might have a small little crush on your boss, but you decide to bury it deep, not wanting to ruin the friendship that is slowly starting to form.

[weirdowithaquill]

Traintober 2024: Day 2 - First Light

Lighting the Fire for the First Time:

The men stood in the works, all congregating around the little engine. The engine was not yet painted, still the same colour as all the parts used in putting it together. In fact, the engine had not yet even been fired for the first time, instead being stonily silent, completely unaware.

“What’s on the agenda today?” asked a workman, striding in with a sandwich and a cup of coffee. “Yer all standing round the new-build like it’s about to become the oracle!” “We’re preparing to light their fire for the first time,” explained one of the others. “David’s about to toss in the rag.”

David looked up from where he’d been loaded the shovel with a couple smaller logs and a newspaper. “No I’m not – Izzy is.” “Wait, what?!” Young Isabelle ‘Izzy’ Hugh was the daughter of David Hugh, and by far the youngest person in the workshop. She’d been part of the project from the start, helping out after school and on the weekends, heaving on greasy overalls and a breathing mask so she could dive right into helping to build the Skarloey Railway’s new engine. All the workmen thought of her as one of their own… but rather conveniently, none of them had mentioned to her that they’d agreed that Izzy would have the honour of being first to light the new engine’s fire.

The sixteen year old blinked at the assembled group once, twice, thrice, before stepping forward. “Me?” she asked slowly. “Yep!” grinned her father. “You’ve earnt it.” Izzy blushed at the praise, and took the shovel as one of the workwomen who’d helped teach Izzy how to weld stepped forward and dumped the rag Izzy had constantly used to wipe her hands throughout the project on the shovel.

“I can’t wait to work with you again,” she said, ruffling the teen’s hair before stepping back. On closer inspection, Izzy realised that the rag had been soaked in diesel, leaving it practically dripping with oil.

“Ok, so what you do is place the shovel on the edge of the firebox, use the matches to light it, then push it in,” explained David. Izzy nodded seriously at her father’s words, stepping gingerly up to the footplate with the loaded shovel. She pressed her foot to the firebox doors pedal, and grinned when they swung open without even a squeak. She rested the end of the shovel on the open firebox, then let her father grab the other end so she could light a match.

The rag burst into the flame the moment the match touched it, and Izzy took back the shovel, gently lowering it onto the coals resting in the firebox.

For a moment, nothing happened – then slowly, the coals began to catch. There was a long, sleepy yawn from the front of the engine. “Hoooo, wow, I feel stiff!” yawned a voice. Izzy blinked.

“Is that… grandpa?” she quizzed, turning to her father. David just shrugged, equally confused. Izzy placed the shovel down, and the pair walked round to the front of the engine.

The engine gazed down at the pair. “Uh… hello. Who are you?” asked the engine, their eyes flicking between the two. Izzy began to laugh. “They sound just like Grandpa Ivo!” she chortled, leaning on the engine’s left buffer. The engine perked up. “Is that my name? Ivo?” David and Izzy shared a look, both having the same idea. They turned back to the engine, twin grins on their faces.

“Yep! Your name is Ivo, Ivo Hugh. Welcome to the family!”

Back to the Master Post

[defodisturbed]

Forever Festival - Jake Sully x reader

(A/N: hey pookies um i've been waiting to write this but i've been on such a slump :(( so ya I hope you enjoy!!)

Jake sat on a log, watching as everyone danced around the fire. He was enjoying the festival as the Omatikaya danced and chatted among themselves. He then spotted you dancing. He watched you with curiosity, keeping his gaze on you as he drank. As you danced, his eyes burned with flames that were unmistakable for anything but pure desire. His eyes never left you as he gripped his cup. He watched you, your body moving to the music. Every slight move or twitch you made, he was focused on it. Nothing else mattered in the moment.

He'd been Olo'eyktan for a while now, but had yet to find a suitable Tsahik. Until you came along, dancing and enticing all of the other males.

The other males were watching you, and that only seemed to piss Jake off who gripped the cup he was holding tighter. He never took his eyes off of you, eyes narrowing as the other men looked at you.

He stood up and walked toward where you were dancing with the others, a firm look on his face as he watched you from the sidelines. Some of the men moved out of the way once they saw him approach, all sensing the growing irritation that was building within him.

He moved behind you, grabbing your hips and pulling your back flush against his chest. He leaned down, his breath hot against your ear as he spoke. "Come with me," he said firmly before tugging you off into the shadows away from the festivities. You yelped softly as he dragged you away, the other Na'vi whispering and gossiping among themselves. What business did a 43-year-old man have with such a young girl? She had to be at least 2 decades younger than him.

Jake took you into his hut, setting you on the bed. You looked around at all of the decorations and the general setup, admiring everything.

"Olo'eyktan... what is it you need from me?" You asked, unsure of why you were taken from the festivities. You noticed a glint in his eyes that you couldn't quite put a finger on. You noticed lust, desire, and... hunger. But not for food.

"Do you know how the men have been looking at you all night? You're a temptress, aren't you?" Jake growled into your ear. His calloused, rough hands trailed up and down your hips.

"Olo'eyktan... I-I do not know what you mean. I did not mean to tempt the others..." You hesitated. You did not know how he would react to your claim. Unexpectedly, he held back from his obvious lustrous desires. He needed to court you first before you even thought about intimacy.

"I have been looking for a mate suitable for me for a while, and none of the others have caught my eye. But you.. you are different. I wish to court you. To mate with you." Jake rumbled. You were caught off-guard by his forwardness and decided to just go for it. He was the Olo'eyktan. He got first dibs on the food and such, so he could provide for you easily. He was also incredibly handsome.

You looked deep into his eyes. You could see the hurt and the coarse exterior it caused. You knew he needed you, now more than ever.

"Yes. I will let you court me. I would like to be your mate." You smiled, taking his rough, calloused hand into your own. You held his hand with such tenderness he hadn't felt in years. The softness of your skin was that of an angel, and he wanted to keep you forever.

MWAH hope you guys enjoyed it omg I haven't posted a fic in SOOOOOOOOO long!!!!!! I'm happy with this one it was inspired by a cai bot <333

@dyingofcookies

[avidredux]

I think for my first original post on this blog I'm gonna talk about hyrule because he's got a vibe to him that I'm trying to decipher desperately

I don't even know where to begin. I think first I'll start with how I dont know how I ever thought he was shy when I first started reading linked universe. humble, yes. awkward at times? definitely. shy? nope. makes fun of time openly for being old¹

makes puns²

elbows people³ (not only elbowing someone not even in the conversation, but interrupting him as well, to talk to someone else entirely; i love hyrule dearly)

shouts orders⁴

grabs time by his shirt and yells in his face⁵(!? this is crazy to me, i can’t imagine any other member of the chain doing this even considering the circumstances. i repeat: i love hyrule dearly)

he doesn't read as shy so much as reserved to me. he doesn't feel the need to fill a silence but he definitely isnt afraid to. I think about the little statue twi makes them chase after a lot. in that scene, hyrule is the one investigating first, and when it runs off, he orders sky and wars to go after it and they do. a captain of the hyrulian army and a graduate of the knights academy (and future king!) and they just listen to him. it makes me wonder how intense he must have sounded.

a few updates later and he brags he can take a whole camp down himself with ease while bantering with wars.⁶

I'm kind of just rambling at this point and I'm aware not a lot of it makes sense so I'll come back to this with more coherent thoughts but yeah

don't get me wrong, nothing wrong with a shy anxious hyrule, I'm just wondering where it came from because I also used to pretty exclusively look at him like that when I was first reading the comic a couple years ago

accidentally added a poll and idk how to get rid of it so random poll and refs under the cut

all art belongs to @/linkeduniverse

this blog will be like my little log of observations and thoughts. as such I'm probably going to ramble a lot sorry in advance

¹ masks pt.2 & malon pt.5

² entrance pt. 1 & like like

³ dawn pt. 5

⁴ divine dark reflections pt. 9

⁵ dawn pt. 2

⁶ magic sword (one of my favorite updates and one day I'll do a breakdown of why)

[a-shrieking-cloud-of-bats]

DF Posting: KingChannels - Year 3

Here we are again. Much belated on account of me having an awful head cold for most of the past two weeks.

The beginning of the defensive layer, which, as time has gone on, has only gotten less solid. Regardless I think having room to retreat behind corners when archers come a knocking will be helpful.

We left last year with the trade depot Almost complete, and the defensive layer, starting up. Happy to say we made a lot of progress on both, but a lot happened so we'll start from the top.

Early on the elven caravan arrived; I personally have no abnormal distaste for the elves (even if selecting everything in a bin except the bin is obnoxious), but we didn't have any trade goods because I'd not decided to, you know, make any, on account of sheets being wanted next year. So we didn't really get anything, not that they brought much. Not even very many animals. Very dissapointing honestly. Didn't even get a screenshot.

Our starter library. We probably won't need it anymore after we start getting the tower constructed but that could be a while. I set a scholar to work here after I made it as well, and installed a table later on.

In the meantime we made a starter library for our scholarly pursuits to begin in earnest, rather then waiting for the tower to start construction. It's small, but it'll work. We assigned Ingish Arzesidan as scholar, our old woodcutter. She honestly loves it and is constantly getting good thoughts from debating and pondering, though these are somewhat offset by her bad thoughts from not practicing a craft. Thems the breaks. Around this time I also started making clothes from our pig tail fiber, to ensure our in fort child would have clothing. Also so anyone whose clothes rot off can get a new set.

Our first scholar.

After all that hubbub we almost immediately got a migrant wave; 9 dwarves, 2 melee dwarves for the military, and a High Master Surgeon, very nice. This reminded me we needed to make a hospital. My idea is to build it on the ground floor, likely near the cistern, hopefully out of the way of any trouble in the event anyone needs to be brought to it during combat. It'll also make getting the water from the cistern to the nearly required hospital well less of a pain in the butt.

The first two are our melee dwarves and the last is the surgeon.

Around the time of the migrant wave we got another Child Strange Mood; it finished around the time we finished sorting otu the migrant wave as Ablel Regezar only grabbed two apple wood logs. He made, adorably, a toy axe, Desiszisang. During the course of this year I caught several dwarf children playing with it so at least it's getting use!

The fort's most popular toy. And... only toy, now that I'm thinking about it.

Of note; all this happened in Early Spring. This was a very rapid fire series of events, but things slow down a bit henceforth. Not before finding a mysterious vomit trail from the trade depot to the first floor of the fortress entrance. Probably a dwarf that'd been underground long enough to get cave adapted. I didn't see any sign of combat, anyway, so it's not an injury at least. Regardless the fort now has its first streak of green mess. There will be many more.

Every fort, by the end of the run, is usually just covered in blood and puke. This is small potatoes.

Taking up the next large swathe of time was mostly me digging to find ores, rather then for fortress construction, with the completion of a stockpile I was digging near the metal processing area to store ore and coal. During this time I'd noticed unhappy dwarves were looking pretty intimidating, I think it hit a high of 16 which is more then a third of our fort. You've gotta nip this in the bud so in a mostly ineffectual attempt to do that I made some meals. Mostly quarry bush leaves, but higher food quality = happier dwarf. Unfortunately we don't really have a lot of edible wildlife, I've only seen ravens and they're too small to butcher and a pain to catch besides. Maybe one day we'll be eating raven eggs, but it seems like a bit too much trouble for now.

all of my mining floors start like this. I want people to be able to move through them well in the event I use them for something more important then burial site.

We hit Lignite and Iron shortly below where I started digging exploratorily. Very good sign; if we can find flux we've got steel, which is fantastic. That'll handily take care of most of our fortress defense needs, at least as far as we can hope for. We also found kaolinite which will make us some high quality ceramic stuff when I set it up. I also intend to use the exploratory digging tunnels for most of our burial slabs; it just feels appropriate to me.

During all this, the work on the defensive layer was moving along. The windows on the left are Gem windows, and we'll be layering some fortifications over hte front of them to ensure noone just breaks in through those windows. Eventually patrols or watch animals will keep an eye out through there to let us know when goblins or kobolds are skulking around. Hopefully, anyway.

It was around this time I realized my military squads had Never Stopped Training. I looked into a bit of stuff regarding the new UI and it turns out they've been on manual training, never stop mode, for like a year now. That's probably why everyone's so pissed off. I fix that and indeed the bad moods at the fort start dropping, thankfully. THe summer migrant wave also hit, 8 dwarves. A high master metalcrafter, a high master furnace operator, and a middling papermaker. Normally the papermaker would be on hauling duty, but given we're making a library... hmm. Two randos from the wave got drafted into our military squad making an even 10. Training can Really start now. Especially now that they're doing advanced training and teaching and sparring and such. They don't do that on manual evidently.

Once more, oru new Local Celebrities. I also assigned another dwarf to scholarship around this time I believe; Kadol Usenvabok. We'll probably worry more about the scholars when the tower goes up because if I keep posting dwarf thoughts we're gonna hit the image cap.

Seconds after this migrant wave the high master metalcrafter enters a secretive mood. Looks like we're getting a legendary metalcrafter. Honestly sort've stinks; he was allmost there anyway. Regardless, he goes to work. After some livestock butchery, he makes an Artifact Silver Chain out of Horse Leather, Chert Blocks, a Silver Bar, and cut bloodstones. Pretty nice sounding, and we can definitely find a use for it somewhere. Probably put it in a well, but maybe we can find some sort've novel use for it in the tower. It Is silver after all.

Pretty Good.

As we moved into autumn, I realized we were running out of food for some reason. Had the realization we weren't growing any plump helmets in autumn for some reason, so I fixed that. Also set about to making another still, as the population was getting quite hefty and a single still probably wouldn't be cutting it for much longer. As time went on it stabilized, and later in the year restocked itself so we're good again. Crisis Averted.

Shortly before the caravan arrived there were officially enough farmers in the fort to qualify for a farmer's guild. I immediately set about making one of the rooms I Dug out for specifically this purpose into a farmer's guild, and everyone was happy about it. Farmer dwarves will talk about farming in there, along with just generally socializing. It'll slowly increase their skills in various farming aptitudes. It's great.

The Dwarven caravan arrives annnnnd I forgot to make trade goods. God damn. I quickly hammer out some rock rings and buy some iron bars, using them to make a weapon for the militia. Need stuff sooner then later, and we're not exactly short on iron. The liason requested Amulets, which is great for us and I Immediately set on that to avoid this problem next year. I make our standard selection of military grade metals and silver.

Around this time enough work on the cistern got done for me to be comfortable draining the pond, finally. I wanted to get constructed stuff in there sooner rather then later because... I like constructed stuff. No dirty hole water here.

the top floor hadn't been walled in yet but I did take care of that over the rest of the year.

I love a bit of fluid mechanics in DF so this excited me. I've actually not done a lot of it, but I love the concept. We'll probably need another pool or two before it'll have enough loaded in to make its way to the hospital well, but it rains all the time here, so it shouldn't be too long. Since we've got enough standing water in the cistern too (about a full z level), we can just dump in whatever we can get and it'll be stored too, so that's nice.

Anyway the autumn migrant wave hits annnnnnd we got two dwarves. I forgot I had the migrant cap lowered to a pitiful 50 due to a previous fort I ran, so that's my bad, Yet Again. I raise it to 100. The two dwarves were not notable in any way. I also assign a scribe to our library to copy the books we do have.

As we trundle on towards winter, a child is posessed, which has become a commonplace enough occurrence that I honestly wasn't particularly interested. More livestock died to feed the leather requirement, and he got wood, bones and leather.

Before he finished his artifact, however, a werehare broke into the depot. He immediately bites down on Logem Urvaddatan, our freshly recruited high master surgeon, and shakes him to bits.

So much for that hospital. KingChannelses first fatality. Brutal.

There were two militadwarves nearby at the time so they immediately set to attacking the werehare (with picks?? why do you people have picks equipped you're not miners), and he goes down pretty unceremoniously, being an unarmored, roughly human size, enemy.

During the scuffle however, a militadwarf was bitten. This means they are now a werehare, and they Will be hostile to their fellow dwarves when they turn.

The bitten militiadwarf on the left, Iden Eshtanmubun and more competent combat on the right.

Me, not willing to create isolation chambers for bitten dwarves, and not wanting to have to deal with this guy popping off every quarter of a year, elect to banish him. Iden Eshtanmubun has no family in the fort, so nobody is going with him. He's upset, but what's he gonna do, come back as a werehare to take revenge? Hopefully not. He was actually also a aprt of the wave the surgeon came in on, so I guess the wave was just cursed. We'll have to keep an eye on Ablel Dumatdeleth, I Suppose.

After all of the drama and our first death, the child finishes his artifact, a horse bone pick. Maybe someone will actually use it. I kind've don't care right now kid I'm sorry.

I am normally quite happy about equippable artifacts, even if they're shit, but a pick is pretty hard to equip on purpose and they all behave the same regardless of material.

After processing all this I realized our defensive layer is pretty much done, our wall is done, our trade depot is done, it's time to build that overhang. I don't think the werehare climbed in over the wall but better safe then sorry. Unfortunaetly, while trying to do this, I realize my wall is too close to the edge of the map to build an overhang. So we have to rebuild half of it. Ugh.

In the shadow of death we find.... more menial labor. As usual, I guess.

I immediately stat making another layer of the wall on the relevant sides inside the fort. We'll worry about tearing down the outside layer later. I'd rather have a wall people can climb over then no wall at all. This in and of itself takes about til the end of the season, so we'll carry on with other stuff, though the death was the last major event of the year.

Other then some boring logistical stuff (we ran out of chert I can't color coordinate until I mine more rarrrr), the rest of the year was pretty quiet. We found some Green Jade, a 20 value gem, which is Very nice, we found more iron on the living floor, while expanding it for future waves, which I mined out, and our scribe made a copy of our one book, The Way of the Path of the Moon. Or whatever. It was something like that.

As the year drew to a close, the baby born in fort grew to a child and learned to walk on his own. He is no longer at risk of being used as a shield by his mother, and they ran out into the snow and immediately got pissed off about being snowed on. Thanks kid. She can now harvest and haul stuff, so she'll be a minor help for the next.... 15 years. Frankly if we see her grow to be an adult that alone is a fantastic run.

Baby Lolor Rimtarilir, like all dwarves, immediately knows where the clothes are upon gaining locomotion. She's also pissed off because of the snow. Get in line Lolor.

Along with the baby becoming independent, our initial Scholar, Ingish, became an astronomor. He's officially studied the book about the moon's path enough to gain a title. Our mental pursuits are looking up.

A monumentous occasion given the goal of our fort. We need more eggheads. They're chopping a tree right now but rest assured they are very intelligent.

And that's that. A death, a lot of construction and a working cistern; that will continue, but we are pulling up on the end of Surface construction not involving the tower, at least, maybe another couple of years? Hopefully we'll have sterling silver production in hand by then.

Next years goals are finally get that cistern loaded up with water and giving our dwarves an indoor well, Finish The Damn Wall, and hopefully find flux and start steel production. Also hopefully we find silver. I guess if we can't find any silver on site a ceramic tower might be good. And very silly. Same color anyway. We'll see.

Until Next Year. Our fortunes rise and fall together.

[ranchracoon]

"Body, Flesh, and Bones" Chapter 2: Reward

Master Post

Chapter 1

It's been an entire day; your stomach grumbles from hunger, your throat burns with thirst, and your head pounds. To pass the time you whisper prayer to yourself and occasionally give names to the men circling the site, just in case you escape; Beast is the big burly man with more hair than skin and a caveman like face, Ken looks like the OG Ken from Barbie, Larry looks like Larry the cable guy, and the final one is Boss who seems to be running the joint and you never get a clear look at his face. It's nightfall again when two headlights appear from the far side of the clearing where an old logging road is. As the vehicle approaches, your blood runs cold as you see 'Countryside Animal Control' written on the side. You know him! He knows you! The vehicle stops and out steps the man you've known since birth, your own neighbor Mr. Uca. He doesn't see you, instead he speaks with Boss who points to a row of people. 

 The only thing you can do is watch people dragged out by gunpoint into the backside of a truck, like literal animals. When you narrow your eyes, you see them getting stuck with something by Mr. Uca, most likely a sedative. You tuck your head into your knees, whispering prayer after prayer. You think of your grandmother, plead if her spirit can hear you to help you when one of the men starts whistling and your head shoots up. There's another whistle from deep into the woods, a voice on the wind sounding like a young child asking for help. The men pause what they're doing, one of them motioning for the other to check it out. While that one goes to investigate, the others continue their task which means it's your turn. 

The man points his gun at you as he opens the cage, ordering you to walk. The other grabs you forcibly by the arm, most definitely going to leave a bruise as he shoves you along the path to the truck. The back of the truck is right in front of you when Mr. Uka looks up and freezes, you mouth the words 'help me' and all he does is shake his head slightly. He reaches to inject you, you struggle and fight against the one holding you until the other slams his boot into the back of your knee. Once on the ground and dazed by the pain, Mr. Uka injects you in the arm when a blood curdling scream echoes from the forest followed by numerous rounds of gunshots. You're thrown to the ground with your head shielded as the men point their guns toward where the scream came from. 

"What the fuck is that?!"

Then you hear them; the whispers blowing on the wind and surrounding you as the wind picks up violently sending sparks from the nearby campfire. Those sparks ignite the nearby fuel source of dry twigs, leaves, and branches, you look up seeing the flames now a roaring inferno and dangerously close to you. There's loud, heavy footfalls with hundreds of rounds of ammunition fired off followed by another scream which is cut short with a wet crunch. You scramble to your feet, now might be your chance as you lift yourself up onto the locked cages, swiping upward to unlock them before attempting to break for the tree line. All in vain when a sharp pain cuts through you and you look down seeing blood staining your shirt, the last noise you hear is a scream that sounds like a thousand screams in one.

Then a voice. 

You know this voice. 

It is the voice that whispers to you in the night, the one that beckons you beyond the borders of your town. 

Numerous voices, accents of different eras melted into one. 

"My child."

Your grandmother. 

"My. Child."

That voice. 

"While you sat in those shrines with your peers praying to a false God, you spoke our names. While whispers to those around you, they were screams to us. The last one to remember us, to worship us. So you shall be rewarded."

One voice stretches out above the rest, a womanly voice.

"I gift you my boon, you have a long journey ahead but soon, when you are ready, shall become one of us. An ancient being, capable of the incomprehensible. You shall spread our names like the fire that consumes, you shall shaken and tumble false beings in your wake."

Another voice, manly this time.

"I gift you the strength of an elephant, with the fight of a boar. You will be my champion."

The voices mix, another womanly voice with an unfamiliar accent breaks through.

"I give you the gift of resurrection, death will not embrace you. Heal those that are broken, return those worthy to the land of the living, and guide those lesser to my domain."

Finally the voices are in unison once more.

"I give you my boon, the ability of adaptation. The world will throw you in many directions, and each place you shall conquer as if you've always belonged."

Blackness. 

Nothing but black and darkness. 

Are your eyes open? Closed? Everything must have been a dream right?

Yet your body is swaying, you can hear the frighten chattering of those around you and the squeaking of metal. Are you on a boat?

You sit up, your body feels equal parts heavy and light, you suck in a breath but your lungs do not inflate. It feels as though your chest is hollow, with each breath the wind merely passes through as if there's no organs or skin to block it. When you hold your breath there's nothing, no tightness or strain on your chest or head, perhaps you don't need to breath at all. You wet your lips and touch your shirt, it's dry but when you fondle it there's segments of cracks you can feel with your fingertips. The air around you is humid, stale, acidic with the aroma of feces and urine, including yourself. The swaying is rhythmic, and the creaking of metal indicates you are indeed on a ship, in a shipping container no less.  When you blink there's no change to the darkness, you reach up and touch your eyelids to make sure your eyes are still there. 

You count the passing days by the shift of temperature. During the day, the contain is near boiling, whereas during the night it is near freezing and you become acquainted with those nearest you. There's a leak in the ceiling where droplets of rainwater comes through, each person takes a turn underneath giving some temporary relief to the sandpaper in their throats. Constantly on the verge of dying, you do nothing but sleep, you don't have the energy to even pray. 

The container jolts everyone awake in a panic, as it moves and loud beeping can be heard from outside. No one utters a noise, they're too weak to. The container jerks again, this time it vibrates and shakes with the occasional bump meaning they must be on a truck now. The ride is long, or maybe short, it's harder to gauge with no light or other sounds. Your head and heart are silent, even your dreams are nothing but blackness and emptiness. The truck halts to a stop and the back door is flung open abruptly making everyone inside shudder and shield their eyes from the blinding light. More men flood the container, shielding their faces from the smell and taking advantage of everyone's weakness. They fling them as easily as you could fling chickens, tossing one by one out of the container until it's your turn. 

He has a harder time grabbing you, he attempts to fling you in the same manner as he did the others but is caught off guard. He grunts and tries to pull you up again, but you do not budge, finally he yells at you in a language you don't know.  The language you do understand is when he uses the muzzle of his gun to probe your shoulder, making you stand and walk. You shield your eyes from the blinding light only to adjust and find it's nothing more than a fluorescent overhead light. It's dark out other than the surrounding lights all pointing downward to a rundown looking warehouse. The man pokes your shoulder again and you walk behind another person, single file marching into the building.  

Chapter 3

[lanaxoxoxoxoxox]

why can't i get you out of my head ?

this is part 2 !! read part 1 here

original request by @heiijoy

warnings: cute fluff, slight panic ig???

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

2 weeks later

If you have told 17 year old me that Ranboo and I were dating, I would have probably passed out. I've had a crush on him since we first met on the Dream SMP, and the fact that we're actually dating blows my mind.

I was chilling at Ran's house on his bed, scrolling through my phone as Ran worked on some writing for his horror series, Generation Loss on his desk. I peaked up from the edge of the bed and saw his back of his head and a slight few of his fingers typing on a Word document.

"You know, you better add me in the "Thank you" in the credits. We can tease the viewers and make them wonder who the hell I am! They're gonna go crazy when we tell them." I joked, putting my phone away in my pocket.

Ran turned his gaming chair around to face me and fixed his hair. I could see his chest moving up and down slowly from his breathing. "Speaking of telling." he paused. "I want to tell our friends about us. We're going to meet them later today, and I don't want to hide it anymore. I don't want to have to hold your hand under the table or wait until we're in private to kiss you. If you don't want to just yet, that's totally fine. We can take it in small steps, whatever you wan-"

I cut off his words. "Darling, I would love that!" I said, getting up to hug him. He sighed in relief and hugged me back, squeezing me tighter. "I do have an idea how we can tell them." I said, smiling, sitting on the floor next to him.

Ran perked his head up. "What if we don't tell them anything directly, but rather show it using actions? We try to make it obvious at the same time as well."

"Oh! Like we could hold hands in front of everyone very clearly and just wait for someone to react!" Ran smiled.

I smiled back at them. "That actually could be perfect."

4 hours later

Ranboo and I walked to the Brighton pier sign, and saw no one was there. We decided to take a quick photo to post on our socials to provide some "clout" for us. Ran grabbed his mask out of his pocket and put it on, and posed for the picture. As I was editing, we saw Tommy, Jack, and Niki start walking over to us.

I looked over to Ran and mouthed, "You ready?". He nodded and smiled at me.

We both walked over to them, not holding hands just yet. I ran over to Niki and gave her a hug. We all greeted everyone and I went over to Ran and grabbed his shoulder. Before we started dating, Ran would have been an absolute stuttering and blushing mess. Now, he's 100% more calm since we're together.

I looked over to take a quick peek at Jack's and Niki's face, and they both shared looks with each other. Tommy didn't even notice from his amount of energy. I giggled quietly into Ran's shoulder.

We were walking towards the arcade and I stopped to look up and Ran. I winked and said, "Love, can I have my wallet please?" I smiled at him.

Ran nodded and grabbed my wallet out of his pocket and gave it to me, smirking as he could see Jack and Niki shocked, even Tommy just standing there awkwardly.

Jack leaned over to Niki and spoke quietly to her, even though we could still hear them talking. "What the fuck?" he laughed.

We walked around the pier some more, and then went to the sea side to hang out for a bit. We walked down to the rocky area, and placed down our things on the log before sitting down. Ran was about to sit down on the log. This was the final step of our "plan" we had created earlier that day.

I pulled out my wallet and phone from my front pocket. "I'm going to buy water for myself, does anyone else want anything?" Jack, Tommy and Niki all shook their heads no.

Ran spoke up. "Can I have a water bottle as well?"

I nodded and went over to him and kissed him quickly on the lips.

I quickly saw Tommy and Jack stop in their tracks and stare at us.

Jack sputtered. "W-wha-what?"

Tommy yelled. "Why didn't you tell us, you bitch?!"

Niki just smiled.

Ran and I looked at each other and started laughing.

"Oops! Guess it's out now!" I said, sarcastically.

Gosh, I loved this man.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

this is really short but its so cute 😭❤️

please support me by liking, replying, rebloggling or following my blog! asks are currently open!

thank u for reading <3

love u lots xoxoxoxoox

[pureamericanism]

Compared to ecologically and topographically similar regions of Europe or east Asia, the northeastern United States is unusually heavily forested. One might think "well, yeah, the U.S. hasn't been settled by agriculturalists for as long and is less densely populated, obviously there's going to be less percent land cleared for farms," but this is not so! Everywhere in the northeast, our forests rise from what were once old fields. In 1860, for instance, Maine was only 60% forested by land area. Today, that proportion is closer to 90%.

We owe our current landscape to two great waves (and several smaller ones) of farm abandonment. The first happened in the decades after the Civil War, when for various reasons* northeasterners (mostly from New England) packed up their pitchforks and decamped to the midwest. This had been going on before the war too, of course, but up until then it had not been in numbers enough that the northeastern farms stopped being worked. There was always a son or two left to till up more stones from the Vermont field. But that changed after the war, and the fields started to revert to oak and maple and pine. Indeed, much of the early formal scientific study of American forestry and ecology happened in these old Yankee fields and young Yankee forests, by outdoorsy young men from Harvard with names like a Lovecraft protagonist.

The second great wave was in the Great Depression and World War 2, when for various reasons** people from all the rougher sorts of terrain the east has to offer - from West Virginia to Indiana's Brown County to the Ozarks and back to the Catskills - left their farms to come down and seek work in the then-thriving industrial cities. Much of the hilly landscape of the east that had previously been dotted with small subsistence farms, full of exactly the barefoot gap-toothed hillbillies who captured the imagination of urban popular culture with their exotic poverty and folkways when they suddenly appeared in Cleveland, or wherever, in 1933.

These pulses of farm abandonment have left very specific patterns written in the ecologies of the northeast. For instance, the fact that the poor ridgetop farms that were once extremely common in Southern Ohio and Indiana were nearly all abandoned in the 1930s and '40s means that the forests that now grow there are uniformly approaching their first century (excepting, of course, where there's been logging in the meantime.) This is almost exactly long enough for the process of ecological succession to complete itself, and the forests to move into their mature phase.

And so you read books written in the '50s, '60s, or '70s about these areas, and you notice how common early successional species are, everywhere chokecherry and black birch. Whereas today the only evidence you may see of the forest's relative youthfulness is a few very large bigtooth aspens nearing the end of their lives, surrounded by tulip poplars and chestnut oaks that will endure for many years after all the aspens are dead.

*Young men returning from war with a restlessness and a desire to leave home again; those same young men posted far from home during the war and realizing just how awful the New England soil is, lmao; Republican government policy writtrn explicitly to favor small homesteaders heading west; the late 19thc. crash in agricultural prices (as, in a few short decades, the Great Plains, the Australian wheat belt, parts of the Kazakh and Siberian steppes, the plains of South Africa, and the Argentine pampas were all put under the plow for the first time, and during an era of global free trade) making many small farms entirely unsustainable.

**Years of erosion on fields carelessly laid out on steep terrain; the Great Depression making running a small farm, ah, difficult; economic modernisation making staying as a subsistence farmer a damn foolish thing to do; new roads and automobiles making fleeing to the city easier than ever; and the TVA and other federal land grabs displacing hundreds of thousands of people.

[rabbitzk]

Javier Escuella x Reader! Tsundere

Warnings: None

Type: Fluff

Fandom: Red dead redemption 2

Just my first Tumblr post, have fun! By the way, English is not my first language! 😅

It was another day in the Van Der Linde gang, it was already midnight, but no one was asleep or tired, on the contrary.

Sitting by the campfire, listening while everyone was having fun, singing together. Javier was playing his guitar and everything was as peaceful as ever. 

But I had things to do...

In the bar, music playing, drunks and women offering themselves, just another normal day in Valentine.

— One more down! — Javier was shouting, sitting in front of the bar, two women in his arms, Arthur kept shouting for Lenny, and Lenny... where's Lenny? Whatever.

There was a man looking to pick a fight with Arthur, provoking him, the state of the two men was deplorable. Two drunk men fighting, only to start dancing.

— Idiots...

A strange man, tall and kind of fat, comes up to me, teasing me, I just ignore him, until he grabs my arm and shouts, annoyed.

Javier sees this and is about to intervene.

— Hijo de puta, leave her alone-

Before he can finish his sentence, I punch the man in the face, right in the nose, breaking it in the process.

— Wow. 

— Don't mess with an outlaw, you strange idiot.

The man, realizing what he was dealing with, walks away.

Snapping my head out of my trance, I speak:

— Okay, guys, I'm off to my tent, I've got things to do in the morning. — I get up from the log I was sitting on next to Tilly, and Javier. 

— Already? — Tilly asks. 

— Yes, important things, Tilly. Good night, then.

After that, I head towards my tent and close it up. 

A few hours had passed, everyone had already gone to sleep in their tents, the perfect time to go out for a horseback ride and clear my head. Leaving my tent and heading towards my horse, Rose, I hear a voice with a strong Mexican accent. 

— Hola, cariño! 

— Javier? What a fright, you idiot! — I shout, but then lower my voice and jokingly punch him in the arm. — Don't do that anymore - to tell you the truth, what are you doing here? It's late.

— Look who's talking. 

— Don't start, Javier.

— Just tell me, what are you doing here so late?

— I wanted to go horse riding with Rose.

— Then I'll go with you. Reminisce about old times.

That was pretty much the end of our conversation, before we got on our horses and set off, heading in the direction of Valentine.

Arriving at a stream, we got off our horses, it was a nice cold evening, but as we were near a part with snow and water, it was cold, so I started to shiver slightly, Javier noticed.

— All right, love? — he asked, walking over to me.

— What does it look like? I'm clearly cold, you idiot...

Javier doesn't answer, moving closer to me, taking off his poncho and putting it on me, my eyes widening slightly.

— Javier... that's your poncho.

— I know, you can keep it on. It's not even that cold... 

He was visibly shivering now, and I sighed before going over to him and pulling him close.

— Just hug me and shut up.

— Sure, cariño...

[dirtytransmasc]

(A gift of Fluff)

_

"You little brat!"

There is a chorus of giggles, high and free, and then a splash as Reyzì jumps away from Z-dog, having just grabbed the woman's tail to pull her into the shallow river, who tries to catch the giggling girl.

Any attempts of teaching the recoms to fish had long been abandoned for horseplay instead. Mansk had tried to continue fishing for a bit but the ruckus of it all had caused whatever fish there were to flee, he was instead pulled into a game of chase with Reyzì and Z-dog.

Lyle was further down, in a slightly deeper part of the river that opened up into a pond, with Ro'eyk, Spider, and Sully's younger boy, engaged in a 3-vs-1 game of chicken. The boys were winning, unsurprisingly, but Lyle was stubborn.

Lopez was a little ways back from the river, still within sight line, with Rävi, who was helping the recom with his archery, and Sully's oldest boy was perched nearby, occasionally calling out advice and jabs.

Prager and Ja were on the other side of the little river, laid out like cats in a patch of sun. Prager was dead asleep - the man could sleep through an air raid - but Ja was still awake, listening idly and occasionally complaining whenever he got splashed by either Reyzì, Mansk, or Z-dog.

Kiri, Augustine's daughter, was floating face down in the pond past where the boys and Lyle wrestled, and the only assurance Miles had that the girl hadn't drowned herself was the light flicking of her tail. Being around her was still a bit of a mindfuck, and every now and again the girl would say or do something that have Miles thrown back into old memories.

Sully and his wife weren't particularly thrilled with their kids spending time around him or his team - evident in how the youngest wasn't allowed to accompany her siblings - which was understandable, but the kids were friends, so there was little that could really be done.

Speaking of Sully...

"Reyzì doesn't have her taser, don't worry."

Miles knew that Sully would try to pin him down eventually, it was inevitable, but the former marine had been rightfully wary after Reyzì took down his wife with her taser. His girl was a one-woman army with that thing.

"I remember when she made that thing," Sully grimaced as he sat down on a nearby log, "it knocked out the old Avatar lab's power."

"She could take down a hammerhead with it if she tried."

There was a resigned sigh, "Yeah, I don't doubt it."

There was a pause as the conversation lulled. Reyzì briefly shot a look toward them, yellow eyes narrowing at Jake before she was distracted by a splash of water to the face. Mansk smirked at the girl and the chase was back on.

"Mo'at is willing to do an official adoption ceremony, once you pass your trials."

Miles blinks and turns to fully look at Sully. It's a bit odd, realizing that he's now technically younger than him. There's a little shriek, more high-pitched, and Miles is surprised to find Sully's youngest has appeared, joining Reyzì in the river with Z-dog and Mansk.

"Pretty sure the kids already adopted us, but making it official will be nice."

Both fathers fall back into silence - not easy but not tense - and watch their kids play.

"I'm being bullied."

Lyle whined, thoroughly soaked and exhausted from his rounds of wrestling with the younger boys in the water, as he flops down next to where Miles sat.

"You'll survive."

posting this now before the angst so some of y'all can know a little peace before the storm.

I have no comments, this is perfect as is, there's nothing I can add.

the recoms being good with kids is my weakspot, it makes me feel all warm inside, and it's the only thing making my cold heart keep going at this point (I've been writing this angst for almost 2 days now, cause I want to make it perfect, and god damn is it talking a toll on me)

and quaritch getting the ok from both jake and mo'at to officially make the kids his own, I'm smiling like an idiot

[shanks42]

Shanks: The ancient prophecy of the missing millennia

Her is Chapter 19. It may be a day or two before I post the next chapter.

Chapter 19: Shank’s terrified episode

Rayleigh and Beck were awoken by Shanks screaming, making them jump before anyone processed what was going on. They burst through the infirmary door and saw Shanks shaking violently and convulsing. Ray ran up and grabbed Shanks by the shoulders, but when he did Shanks eyes shot open and he  flew off the table crawling frantically backwards to the corner of the room. They watched in horror and Shanks cried out in pain before curling up in a ball covering his head begging for something. Everyone else on the ship had come into the infirmary by the and watched the horrific scene unfold, not knowing what to do.

Beck started forward before Ray stopped him by grabbing his shoulder and giving him a look as in ‘I’ll handle it’ before Beck nodded and backed up. Rayleigh slowly started making his way to Shanks having seen the look of absolute fear in his eyes, he vaguely heard Shanks whimper “Please, I will be quiet. Please no more” only loud enough for Beck and Ray to hear. “Shay, it’s ok it’s me Rayleigh. No need to fear, it’s all going to be alright.” he gently said as he reached Shanks and rested his hand on his arm gently pulling it away from his face. 

Ray looked over at Beck and Beck ushered everyone out of the room and closed the door. The only people to remain were Beck, Ray, Luffy, Law, and Chopper. They watched as Shanks looked up and had a very far away look in his eye, Luffy gasped as he saw genuine fear in his eyes. “R-Ra-Rayleigh??? Is it really you??” Shanks whispered, tears in his eyes; he slowly reached out and touched his cheek with a trembling hand. As soon as he made contact, Ray put his hand over his and kept it there trying to ground the young dragon.

“Law, I need a complete list of everything Doflamingo gave him and administered while you were at Dressrosa. I need to know if there are any hallucinogens ASAP” Beck quietly told Law. Without another word Law nodded and he and Chopper left to check the logs of the medical record and have some people check the supplies that were given to them. Rayleigh scooted a little closer remembering that terrified 6 year old when they took him to Impel Down and threw him with the level 6 inmates and tortured him for 2 weeks. He gently grabbed his hand and gently tugged Shanks towards him.

Luffy watched with Beck as Rayleigh grabbed Shanks and cradled his upper body in his lap as he broke down sobbing. Luffy and Beck immediately were by his side holding him and just cradled him between all three of their bodies whispering comforting things trying to bring him back to reality and out of whatever nightmare he was having. “Ray, did you want to go talk to the doctors? I can take care of Shanks from her if you’d like” Beck quietly offered as Shanks was migrating towards Beck. “That sounds like a good idea. I’ve only seen him like this once, make sure he knows you are here and try to keep him close. He’s not in a good state of mind and right now he is truly terrified and scared. Please take care of my boy Beck, Luffy” responded Ray looking between the two men who nodded in acknowledgement as Ray left the room.

Beck gently picked up Shanks and pulled him into his lap gently rocking him back and forth placing gentle kisses on his head as he shook from fear. Luffy watched the exchange in silence as he gently ran his hand up and down the red head's spine. After about 5 minutes Shanks finally stopped shaking and whimpered as Beck squeezed him a little tighter. Shanks lifted his head and looked around only to find a worried Benn and an extremely worried Luffy looking at him with teary eyes. He looked back at them with pained and exhausted eyes before resting his head back on Beck’s shoulder.

“I can leave if you want to be alone with each other” quietly exclaimed Luffy as he started to get up. A low pitched whine came from Shanks as he reached out for Luffy “Please don’t leave, can you two stay with me?” quietly whimpered Shanks. “Yeah of course Shanks, do you want Beck to hold you?” replied Luffy kneeling back down beside him before Shanks whined and shook his head no. “Use your words, Captain” gently replied Beck. Shanks whimpered as if he was scared to say what he wanted “DO you want both of us to lay in bed with you and hold you?” gently asked Luffy looking up at Beck who nodded in approval. A quiet ‘Yes please’ was heard from the sleepy sounding redhead.

Beck carried Shanks over to the bed while Luffy went and got the sheets pulled back and got the bed ready. Beck gently placed Shanks in the middle of the bed before stepping back to take his shirt and shash off. Shanks let a high pitched whine out when Beck let go of him only to relax when Beck got back in bed and pulled Shanks into him. Luffy crawled in behind them and wrapped his arm around Shanks firmly but not to tight. Soon they heard Shanks breathe evening out as he succumbed to sleep. “You can stay if you want Luffy, if you don’t feel comfortable you’re more than welcome to leave” said Beck quietly after he made sure Shanks was sound asleep. “If I was uncomfortable, I would not have climbed into bed with you guys. Shanks needs both me and you and we need to be here for him if anything happens. Besides, it's like when I was a kid and I would snuggle up to him.” smiled Luffy burying his head into the crook of Shanks neck. “That’s very true” replied a sleepy Beck before they both succumbed to sleep.

[princess-pill-enjoyer]

Crazy to log back in after all this time especially after the way I left things. So much has changed and I'm nearly 2 years sober in November. My year long addiction such a central part of me now. Even with me never bothering to take it anymore, being in that state of mind for so long changed me in so many ways. In just a year at that

I've color coded the sections. It was too much of a wall of text. Orange is for work, pink for my boo, green for my life perspective now that im sober and older, the other colors... you'll see it when you get there. Just a summary of everything I've ever wanted to talk about in all this time.

I've quit that job I was talking bout last post. Worked there til mid April and I rage quit. Put my two weeks in then just ain't show for the last what.. 4 days? Fuck that job fr. Assholes worked me to death. How tf I was parttime and working 12 hour shifts back to back at that?

Anyway. I still work in the same field. I'm just at these retirement homes now. I work two at the moment, though one just offered me a new position up there so hopefully I can leave the one closest to me. Buttholes think I'm a robot up there.

The biggest change is thatt, I have a partner now. He's been here with me since late July. We've gotten an apartment now, too as of like 2 months ago now. I've never trusted anyone more.

How it all went down? I was friendly with his sister as she was the one that trained me. I used to talk to her alot which end up leading to me meeting her brother since he also worked up there and was constantly around his little sister. We ended up talking more than me and the sister did. He used to come out to the cafeteria i was running and talk to me for however long time allowed. Whether for an hour or for a few mins, he'd say hi to me.

After a lil while, led to her inviting me to her house. At my old job, in our 12 shift, we were really there for 14 hrs. They gave us an hour and a half break between the 1st and 2nd shift. With her only living 5 mins from the job it wasn't a hard ask lol. Sitting around at that job was not fun. I was by this point not feeling nothing towards my partner but friendship. Which was crazy cause a few days later, I went out there seeing if my dad was outside, only to see him outside waiting to pick up his sister. I was talking to him out in the rain for a lil, then i ofc got in the car to continue talking after a while. Sat there running my mouth for long enough that his sister came out. She had this devilishly big smile on her face when she said "oh I did invite you over"

That one trip led to coming over hanging out with her brother specifically, spending a night watching movies in her room, getting friendly with their mom. I started to feel so welcome. Then, I got a lil tipsy annd bumped my head and he pulled me towards him trying to see if I was okay annnd the rest was history. I ended up moving in, with their mother's push and my family pushing me away with how eager they were for me to gtfo. Barely talk to me now that im gone. Unless i reach out ofc. It's been ups, downs, but he somehow was there through all that.

I even got kicked out the house for "hitting" their mother. In reality, by that point, I was paying $250 a month for the room I shared with him, I paid for household supplies, I cleaned. Everything. So after a while, it was a bit tiring getting screamed at for any and every mistake I made. I had threw away pieces of this series x box and she told me take it out her trash and throw it in the outside. I grabbed as much as I could at the time as I had other pieces already in my hand but it wasn't good enough. She said to come get the rest and I was confused. I just said my hands are full and I went to throw the rest away. But me saying my hands were full was a problem. I don't know if I said it in a tone, I was tryna be as calm as I could, but it wasn't good enough.

She started yelling and talking shit, calling me names. All types of stuff. Me and him was just taking it. Not saying a single thing back, like she liked. But he threw his phone at the wall in frustration and I thought it was time to fix it. It wasn't that serious in my eyes. So I came up to her asking why she thought I had an attitude so we can fix it. I didn't have an attitude and even if I did, I still did what she asked with no hesitation. With two trips, I threw the whole box away and ripped it up just like she wanted to make sure it wouldn't take up too much room. But all that was null and void because of how she perceived my voice.

So in my failed attempts to get her to talk to me, she just getting angrier and angrier which made me frustrated. I just stood there asking again and again what did I do to make you think I had an attitude, her getting mad and saying she ain't have to explain herself to me, which I was trying to explain I wasn't trying to make her explain why she was mad I just wanted to know how I wronged you so I CAN FIX IT. And me standing there and her getting angry eventually led her to pointing a finger right in my face which I swatted away. It was reflex really. Was mere inches away from my eye and I never once touched her so why get physical?? I don't know what possessed her to even do that.

And me swatting her hand, was the worst decision ever. The mother started trying to swing at me, the sisters boyfriend that also lived there at that point was trying to hit me and my boyfriend jumped in and pulled me back. I couldn't focus on nothing anymore and the next thing I knew the sisters boyfriend came up to me and pushed me onto the bed. I was so scared I didn't know what he was going to do next and I started freaking out. I couldn't breath I couldn't think. I just felt so scared and helpless. I had to hear the rest after the fact

My boyfriend and his sister's boyfriend both got into a fight, the sister and the mother tried to break up. The mom got pushed down to the floor in the process (which was as I said, happened during the process of a whole fist fight between these grown men. You'll see why I clarify this), my boyfriend picked him up, and somehow someway, the sisters boyfriend went to go grab his gun. A gun that he apparently had at the house. It was an assault riffle

When he did that the whole atmosphere changed. No one was focused on the fight they were focused on him putting the gun up. Then they came to me and that's where my pov comes back. I was there on the bed curled up crying ripping out my hair, and my boyfriend standing over me just angry at everything. He just stood over me crying frustrated trying to get me breathe. Then the sister just stood over me, like I was an alien. I regretted even saying anything. I wondered if I should've just grabbed it all and just let it fall out my hands so she knew I wasn't being funny acting. I started to wonder if I was right to swat her hand or should I have let her touch me first before I did that. All these thoughts made me feel so powerless as none of those decisions should have led to this brawl.

The sisters boyfriend tried to play man of the house and talk shit and the sister just smiled. My boyfriend still hasn't forgiven her for it. He never looks at her the same anymore. It feels like I broke up the family. To. This. Day. The mom kicked me out and my boyfriend said fuck everyone and left with me. He helped me pack everything because the mom was telling me "my fatass needs to hurry up" and "sitting there like shit sweet" and smart comment after smart comment while I'm over there just bawling my eyes out. We went to his dad's house who asked for an explanation but once we explained, he respected that it was a huge blowup, and the dude pulling out a gun was bigger than all this.

Little did we know, the little bit of relief we felt being at his dad's house for the night would be short lived. The mom, sister, and her boyfriend were all going around calling up family to tell their twisted version of events. They said I hit mama and my partner pushed her to the ground. I felt like a mouse. The whole family hated me atp. But we spent a night at the dad's house, explained everything to everyone calling him and just kept on going. The sisters ended up believing us in saying they were kinda shocked to hear I'd hit their mom knowing how I am so they were more mad that they twisted the story and didn't even include the fact this man just pulled out a gun on their brother. We told everything as it happened so it helped our story alot

Anyway, we lived there for a few months, feeling trapped and stupid. His dad's house was filthy and we were working hard to pay rent at his dad's, find and apartment, and save for a deposit fee. We barely could eat because the kitchen was so nasty half the time you didn't know what you were touching. The silverware were half dirty, the fridge handle always had food remnants caked on it, food would be left out overnight and more, dishes there for days. Everything. This is all because his dad is half blind and his fiance works so she expects him to do all the cleaning. His cleaning skills are not the best but I can't fully blame him given his disability.

We were eating off fast food everyday for months because of this. We'd barely eat just because we hid rhe fact we were eating out where we could, so he wouldn't feel offense on why we wouldn't eat his and her food, and we kept it pushing.

We moved out in April annd things have gotten better in a sense. We argue way more but I think that's natural for how much more we get to be around each other. I don't work as long hours and we're in each other's face 24/7. But I get so angry. I don't know why. It's like I hold back so much, just angry talking at first, then he says something that makes me snap. Then, I'm screaming, throwing things, and I try to get away. It feels all instinct, like someone else is taking over. And all I can do is wait til I calm down and apologize for being scary. I don't hurt him. I never will. I've thrown my phone, broken countless bracelets off me, and I've scratched myself over and over trying to make myself focus on something else, but I've never thrown more than a pen directly at him. I feel so guilty everytime I do it. But I be feeling unheard in the moment and I just want it over with. To be left alone again.

But he holds onto me anyway. He sees me for more than just my blowups. He hates it and has asserted he won't take it forever, but he understands Im not used to love upclose. I'm the ex princess pill enjoyer. I went an entire year with an addiction only my sisters noticed. I've lost my two closest friends along with the whole robotics friend group I thought I'd have in an instant. I usually am one disagreement from losing someone, so I hold it in. But now, I have someone to learn to let it out for. Someone to learn to not blowup for. It's just hard.

I'm really trying though. I tried jumping out the car cause I was so mad and he just stopped the car and held me. Even though he was just as mad at me. We were arguing just a second before. Ever since then, that rage scares me. I'm not in control the way i thought I was. I would never jump out a moving fucking vehicle in my life. You can break your arm, scrape the skin right off you, knock yourself out. Anything. But I just felt this trance of I couldn't keep being in this car arguing and I started saying I couldn't do it and just opened the door. I don't know what I was thinking. I really wasn't thinking. But knowing that's a possibility, I just know I have to fix myself.

I've been doing better. I nowadays will just throw my phone and get mad and he'll just leave it instead of continuing like normal. Then once I calm down, we talk about why I got so mad, he explains why he was mad at me in the first place, and we're good. I hope someday I can skip on the rage part entirely but I've been doing better now that I have a moment to collect myself. Plus, I know no matter what argument, til the day he betrays my trust, I will always want him in my life and these petty arguments change nothing. He's shown me time and time again he loves me through everything so I will make sure I love him unconditionally too.

And that's where everything is now. I'm at work typing this now. I'm resisting the urge to impulsively quit. My boss just called me yesterday frustrated I don't pick up morning shifts last second trying to make it like I just don't want to work. I just don't think that's a humane ask. On your day off, would you want to be called awake at 6am to get up and IMMEDIATELY go to work? No. She'd give me a one day notice on morning shifts too and I'd say no, because I didn't want to cut the day short to go to bed for work. And that's a problem here.

I have a second job that's been great but the distance and pay wasn't the best. But they appreciate me, they've tried to fight for better pay, and the were sad I tried this job. Annnd crazily, I came back, did orders for a few days, and they offered me a part time receptionist while doing orders too. Giving me damn near full time hours. Like FINALLYYYY I'm not waiting on random shifts to make my money. I can just come in and do the same work everyday.

It's not confirmed til Monday but, soon as it's confirmed. I'm outttt

Life doesn't get better, it just changes. If anything it gets worse. Seriously. I've wanted to die all the time lately. It's just a new hurt. You can't ever escape it. In a way, it's harder and easier. On the one hand, you have a different type of worth now. Once you move out, youre not just parents burden, you become your own burden. So that constant guilt I used to feel is gone. I don't ask for help no matter what. I even hate gifts from them now. I feel like they use that as their way to have something to say about what I'm doing. But you burdening yourself also stings cause you have to drag yourself to shit you don't want ALLLLLLL THE TIMEEE. Don't want to go to work? Call in sick? Don't have any sick hours? Call in with an emergency. Gotta do what uou gotta do. I'm not proud of it. But even then... you have to be socially aware of everyone's opinion of your actions. Or, you choosing yourself too many times will make you lose a job, get played at your job, or fuck you over come time to pay everything. It's such a big sacrifice to choose yourself now.

That's just true in general when you get out the house. That's what makes it so difficult.. I barely was choosing myself before. But now? There's no one else but you. If you don't go out to make yourself some money, you'll make yourself miserable worrying about food, bills, and keeping a roof over your head. But some days you argue right before work. Some days you want to end it and you don't want to to think about nothing else. But I have to think, if I fail this time, what's gonna happen? If you try it, and you fail, what are you going to do? Are you gonna be able to afford copays on your hospital stay? Are you gonna be able to get back to work if need be? Are you gonna be able to be in others faces right after that happened to you? Is there even going to be a job waiting on you by the time you recover?

I'm more scared of the day I'll attempt now. If I attempt now, I'll fuck over my partner. I wonder how he'd take it. I'd probably break him. Even though I regularly tell him I want to die to this day, he'll never feel the full weight til he sees how serious it gets for me. I don't want to take away his character showing him that. I'll break up and do it before I sneak off and do something like that now. I know that would hurt him still. But even before him, it's just harder on me making that decision.

I'm still open to it though. Thus far, this life shit still sucks. The work life balance is just gone in America. Unless you're making top dollar, buying a house, regularly vacationing, and having money to properly invest in your hobbies, you're just sitting around on you butt/doing chores/getting business handled. You've always had to work for your money but nowadays uou need to hoard this nonexistent extra money just to do anything. It's so dull. I already didn't want to do this and now I'm bored to death half the time. Great!!!1!11!!! (I've developed a tiktok addiction now. It's an instict for me to get on as soon as I'm not doing anything. I can't stand to be bored for one second 😶‍🌫️)

Anywaysss. That's it. I'm alive, I'm the same, but with a boyfriend now. I have the same brain from way back when I was daily posting on here. There's just more stuff chaining me down to this world. If you read all this thank you. I hope you feel seen. I know it's not easy out here

...and to the people that didn't read. Yea. I get it 😅